Saturday, October 07, 2006

Just one of those days...

I bet you know what I'm talking about. The day starts with you getting out of bed half an hour early because you set the alarm wrong the evening before, and accidentaly stepping on your favorite Teletubby-huggy-bear and thereby squishing his face beyond recognition. After having crawled out of the shower (cold shower - your flatmates have used up all the hot water) you realize that your fridge is empty and that you're out of coffee. There's a pile of dirty dishes in the sink, and it seems as though the plates and mugs are just sitting there, judging you in silence.

You put on some semi-dirty clothes since you're just way to lazy to do this weeks laundry and like some sort of halfcrazed caveman you drag yourself to the store just in order to realize that you forgot your wallet. Not that it really matters though since your wallet is bound to be empty anyway. Why? Because its just one of those days.

It sort of feels as though some sort of mysterious cosmic force is unloading all the shit-karma that it has managed to store throughout all the past millenias on your shoulders, and all you want to do is curl up into a foetal position on the floor and cry while sucking your thumb.

But then suddenly, something changes. A minor fluctuation in the Force, and as the astute Jedi that you are you sense this shift immediately. It doesn't necessarily have to be a big thing, small things have the same impact. That song you like is played on the radio. You get a text message from someone you like. You realize that it's actually Saturday and not Sunday, or, as in my case, you open the window for a smoke and see the most beautiful girl in the world doing her laundry.

So, to the pretty blonde at the laundryplace this morning - thank you for making my day.

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

This place is like a god-damned Benetton ad.

Chinese people, german people, british people, scandinavian people. Asians, africans, europeans and americans. They're all here, and what's more, we all get along great. So far at least.

Obviously, there are groups, clicks (or is it cliques?) and gangs of pakistanis, blacks and chinese people for example, but generally, it's a rather mixed bunch, united by their love of alcohol and general decadence. The brits talk funny, the americans are [mostly] overweight and the scandinavians are all blond, tall and arian. Not that I'm one for generalizations....

You just have to love the giant smoargoasboard that is campus, and how you stop separating the people you see on the street when you realize that all students form some sort of bizarre amalgamate of what's considered to be the typical student. They mutate, begin to slowly transform. Talking the same, walking the same, laughing in the same way. I half-expect to open the door of a lecture theater and find the queen bee perched infront of the podium, busily keeping the hive-mind working.

There also seems to be an abundance of soccerballs around here (sorry, football). They're in the halls, out in campus or sometimes left in the bushes after a drunken night of "beerball". You start recognizing that a crumpled-up coke can is actually a football left from the night before, and the drunk guy kicking it was Beckham in that one moment, even without the faux-homoerotic haircut.

Me likes, me likes.

Very enjoyable.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Blogs are so fucking pointless.

Really, the only reason that someone would decide to sit down in front of his computer and start to rant about his life on a daily basis and then expect thousands of internet users to read it is extreme selfishness. Not only is that person self-centered and egotistical, but they probably also have delusions of greatness, firmly believing that they posses some sort of inherent literary talent which lays dormant just beneath the surface, just waiting to be discovered. Book deals, magazine profiles and your face on billboards all across the world is what every person who starts a blog semi-expects, whether they admit to it or not.

Instead of being weighed down with selfdoubt and apprehension - two things that would keep these pencildicks from posting their whiny emo-like "i-hurt-myself-today-to-see-if-i-still-feel" posts - they insist of bogging down the Internet with their inconsequential, vain and futile posts which nobody's going to read anyway, except for people who will leave a comment in the hopes of getting a visitor at their own blog (this generally being known as the "I'll only listen to what you have to say in order to get to speak myself" phenomenon).

Blogs and pornography are the two main reasons (also, there's online chess and cybersex) why the Internet has become another window into a world of social deprivation instead of an important intellectual tool in the field of masscommunication. Some people will say that MSN messenger, e-mail and Skype are as important in their day-to-day life as say, oxygen, and some will say that the Internet is the only way for people behind the Great Wall of China or Cuba to communicate with the rest of the globe and thusly avoiding censorship. Now, this would all be fine and well, if it weren't for the simple fact that MSN messenger, e-mails and Skype are only used by people to promote their goddamned blogs! If a chinese person behind the great wall sends an e-mail to any random person living on the western hemisphere begging him for uncensored news about the regime that holds his country in a iron-grip, the most likely answer will be "yeah yeah, sure, but you know what? Maybe you should take a peek at my blog, I just wrote about the evils of totalitarianism as well as cultural and philosophical opression, maybe you could give me some feedback on that...?".

Bloggers are people who live out some sort of fetishlike semi-exhibitionistic masturbatory fantasy in which all eyes are focused solely on them.





And that's why I love blogs.